HOW PEAK OIL WILL AFFECT US THROUGH LESS-PUBLICIZED PETROLEUM PRODUCTS:
1. Lucite: Shortage of clear stripper shoes, paperweight factories shuttered.
2. Acrylic: The airbrushed nail industry collapses.
3. Styrene: Indian restaurants will put your leftovers in leaky paper bags.
4. Waxes: Apples less shiny, bikini lines unlandscaped.
5. Vinyl: S&M shops forced to consider alternatives, pretentious bands reconsider releasing 45s for retro-cool cred, crazy old ladies confronted with dilemma when considering how to cover their furniture.
6. Vaseline: Pageant winners' smiles less gleaming, widespread chafing.