Friday, May 19, 2006

Just thinking . . .

One thing, one memory I can't seem to get out of my head today (probably due to how hot it suddenly is out there) is of summer when I was about 13 in Longmont.

It's not like I remember actual events or stories, just moments. Like walking late at night around my neighborhood with my sister while cicadas droned and gnats flew around yellow street lamps. Or staying up late on my birthday (Aug 11) to watch the Perseid Meteor shower in our backyard and waiting until it was absolutely the darkest it would get. I remember spending days at the swimming pool in town, waiting in line for the waterslide though I really thought I was probably too old for it. And early summer monsoon season where we'd have sun all day and then the sky would darken to produce thunderstorms.

I'm not sure why I keep thinking of these things. I guess it is probably because I've been really down lately and these memories are of times when I was happy, and it helps when you're sad to think about times when you were happy. Maybe its the weather. Maybe it's that I'm nearing 25 and realizing that these memories are now 12 years old. Maybe because I wonder what that 13 year old would say if she saw me now, proofreading ad copy for a living.

Sorry for such a downer post to begin the weekend. But I had to get this down. I have my good days and my bad days. Today is what you'd call a bad day.

1 comment:

  1. Hey VV -

    I still get that way thinking back to times in my distant past as well - like when I was 10 - the '64 Pontiac had its transmission upchuck in Guttenburg, Iowa - and we were stuck for 3 serene days of smoked catfish, homemade pies at the diner, and whistling at the cardinals in the trees.

    But then I also realize I've had transformative moments of joy at other times too - incuding some just in the past week.

    Leave yourself room to explore and be curious. Not every moment will be memorable - but memorable ones will show up - ususally without a schedule - and leave their imprimatur.